You Are Not Special – And That’s Awesome


Hey bros,

You might have heard about a high school graduation speech from a few years back, where the phrase “you are not special” was a key theme. The point that the speaker was making is that, even if you were the valedictorian in this class, there were thousands of other class valedictorians in the US alone, and all of them are just as special. Anyway, these words became a popular catch phrase for a while, and some people even tried to politicize it. One target of the “anti-special” crowd turned out to be the participation trophies that some kids received for being involved in sports.

There isn’t necessarily anything wrong with these kinds of trophies, but only if the kids are young enough that they don’t yet have much motivation or even much focus. Beyond that, of course, participation trophies don’t have any point, and even young kids are bright enough to figure that out.

The bottom line is that, unless you’re one of the greatest “X’s” who has ever lived – in other words, an Einstein, a Da Vinci, or a Sun Tzu – you can safely say that you’re not special. You can almost as safely say that you haven’t even met anyone special. I don’t consider myself special, either.

So what’s so awesome about not being special? For one thing, it opens up a lot more possibilities for what you can achieve than if you were simply born to do a particular type of task. A non-special guy can start a billion-dollar company, discover a new genome, or rise to a high elected office. But for bromance, the news is even better.

If you’re not special, most of the bros around here aren’t special, either. So that’s at least one thing you have in common. Why not start a conversation about it? If we’re not special, let’s at least not be special together.

Happy bromancing!

Later,
-The Blog Dude

We Got Hacked


Hey dudes,

On September 5, we got an email from our site host that a hacker injected malware onto our site, disabling user access. We immediately took the site down and started working with a cybersecurity firm, SiteLock, to clean the malware, create a new firewall, and close the access that the hacker had.

Our databases, including the ones with member information, were not affected, and as far as we can now tell, there were no unauthorized accesses to them.

As the bro-prietor, I want to apologize to all seekBromance members for what happened, and I also want you all to know that we’re determined to keep our security levels at a place where this kind of thing doesn’t happen again.

If you have any questions, feel free to go to our support site, and I’ll do my best to answer them. The seekBromance blog will also be there to update you about any developments in this situation.

Now that you know you’re a lot safer, let’s get back to bromancing!

Later,
-The Blog Dude

Real Bros Don’t Rant


Hey bros,

If you take the headlines at face value, it looks like a lot of people, especially here in the US, have been going completely crazy, joining radical movements like the alt right or the far left. Either way, these people are usually guys, they’re always angry, they feel marginalized, and they strike out by spewing venom at anyone who’s not in their club. Sometimes they send death threats and even get physically violent. So WTF is happening? Are we looking at impending social collapse?

No, we’re not. In reality, people like this have always been around. We’re hearing more about them now because (1) the Internet has made it a lot easier for them to find each other, and for them to hate on others, and (2) craziness always makes for news stories that get more people’s attention.

It’s tempting to rant back at these idiots, but don’t. They are so committed to their own propaganda that they will never listen to anything else. Or maybe you feel just as angry about some of the same things that they do. That’s perfectly cool, but it isn’t an excuse to start acting like them.

See, anger can be a great motivator, but a lot of people fall into the trap of thinking that, as long as they rant on social media, they’ve accomplished something. Wrong. If something makes you angry enough to do something about it, make a plan and follow through with it. If it’s truly impossible for you to fix or improve something, even with outside help, then the best thing to do is to put it out of your mind. There’s no point stressing yourself out over what you can’t change.

Later,
-The Blog Dude

 

Your Other Health To Take Care Of


Hey dudes,

By now you’ve heard or read tons of advice about taking care of your health. Stuff that warns you that if you don’t take care of your health, it could wreck your life. All of this has to do with physical health, but what doesn’t get talked about nearly as much is your emotional health. And if you don’t take care of that, it can also ruin your life.

Of course, the rules for taking care of your physical health are pretty simple: get enough sleep, eat a balanced diet, exercise daily, don’t smoke, and don’t abuse alcohol or recreational drugs. (You might be able to get away with breaking some of these rules when you’re young, but as you get older you’ll start to wish that you hadn’t.)

The rules about taking care of your emotional health are pretty simple, too. All you need is to have multiple people in your life who:

  1. Love you (Yes, bros do love each other, just like all close friends do).
  2. Want the best for you
  3. Are supportive of you

That’s pretty much it. And that’s why having one or more bros is so important. Your emotional health is being starved if you depend on all of these things from your spouse, a relative, or your girlfriend – or boyfriend. Trying to get all of these things from a single person just doesn’t work, no matter how wonderful they are. Besides, the more people who can give you this kind of emotional support, the easier it becomes for you to give it back to them. It’s a positive feedback loop. So the more bros you have, the merrier.

There’s one more thing about emotional health that needs to be mentioned, though. Just as there are things that are good or bad for your physical health, there are people who are good or bad for your emotional health. Some people are emotionally abusive, meaning that they put you down, guilt you into doing things for them that no reasonable person would ask of you, or otherwise try to take advantage of your good nature. Don’t let these people remain in your life. They only damage your emotional health, and that damage gets worse over time.

Now back to bromancing! Stay healthy!

Later,
-The Blog Dude

Giving You the Bird More (The Twitter Bird!)


Hey bros,

Until fairly recently, I haven’t done very much with the seekBromance twitter account. It’s set up to tweet all the blog and Facebook posts, but that was about all in the beginning. The reason was that I didn’t have time to do much else with it, nor the money to hire a “social media coordinator.”

So in today’s news, I want to tell you that I’ve discovered a reasonably good happy medium for expanding seekBromance’s twitter presence. It’s an app called Crowdfire, which harvests all the keywords from our blog and other social sites, and – theoretically, at least – comes up with relevant tweets from the twittersphere, all on one neat page so that I can pick and choose which ones I think my followers (you!) will find useful. I hope you enjoy some of them going forward.

Of course, if there’s anything specific that you guys want me to retweet, send me the info. I can’t promise I’ll do it, but I’ll at least review the article.

Happy bromancing!

Later,
-The Blog Dude

You’re welcome, dude.


Hey bros,

At seekBromance.com, if you’re male, a legal adult, and live in one of the 3 countries in our service area, you are welcome as a bro. Nothing else is required. It’s okay if you’re not interested in making friends with a particular guy, but it’s part of our philosophy not to judge other members based on their race, religion, orientation, or country of origin. We don’t make any room for intolerance, and we take reports of harassment extremely seriously.

We’ve celebrated individuality in all its various forms since the site was founded. Our bros live in America, Canada, and the UK. They are Christians, Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Sikhs, Atheists, Buddhists and Agnostics.

As an American, I as your founder strongly believe that America’s history of welcoming others not only represents the best of my country’s values, but it also defines the core of what has made America the great place it is, and has been. Love and friendship, not hate, are the solutions.

seekBromance.com is open to all guys. Thanks for helping us to make it a welcoming place.

Later,
-The Blog Dude

A Brofile Tip for the New Year


Hey dudes,

This time, I’m going to give you another tip for getting your bro-file noticed.

You’ve already figured out, from your browsing and searches, that sometimes the “About Me” part of your bro-file gets partly cut off in the search results, like this one:

The reason that happens is to make sure that each result in the list takes up about the same amount of room on the screen. (The same thing will happen in the upcoming apps, too, but the cutoff point will be even shorter!) If somebody wants to read your entire bro-file, they will have to click or tap to see the full screen that’s all about you.

If you want to maximize the odds that someone will open this full bro-file to see you in all your glory, I recommend that you use a trick from the world of journalism. In a news story, reporters always put the most important information in the first sentence, followed by the second most important, and so on down the line. They do this because their editors cut the story length at the last minute, and there’s no way to know where that cut will be.

In your “About Me” field, you can do exactly the same thing. Put the most interesting stuff in the first sentence, and keep going down to less interesting material. It takes a little work to re-organize, but the payoff can be big.

Best of luck, and happy bromancing!

Later,
-The Blog Dude

When the world has changed so much, bromance can help


Men in general have had a difficult time in the “post-industrial” nations lately. Automation, technology, and trade have all combined to devalue muscle, and that’s very bad news for any man who isn’t academic enough to earn a degree. Also, the number of women in the workforce has exploded in the last few decades. Boys are not performing as well as girls in elementary school. And even men who graduate (with tremendous student loan debt) still struggle as employers hire people overseas at low wages.

Is it any wonder that so many guys have lost their confidence and their will to succeed, and feel powerless because of it?

Having a bro as a close friend won’t solve all these problems, but it will still do a lot for you, as long as you’re as willing to support your bro as he is to support you. In effect, your bro becomes an extension of your family, which can be a tremendous help if you need to work through supportiveness issues with your actual family. You and your bro can motivate each other to stay on track with your goals, whether they’re fitness, job hunting, or entrepreneurship.

Bottom line: if you have a bro, help him to help you succeed. If you don’t have a bro, get one. Make this the year to rebuild yourself into what you want to be: just remember that you probably can’t do it alone.

Later,
-The Blog Dude

The official blog of seekBromance.com